Leadership vs Pushership by Jack Zufelt

Uncovering your Core Desires and unleashing the amazing and very powerful Conquering Force within you will cause you to live a fuller, happier, and more successful life. As you learn to identify and pursue your Core Desires, you may find yourself in any of these three situations.

Mindset vs Core Desire.

The Bible says…”As a man thinketh in his heart so is he.” Our mind can learn whatever it takes to give the heart what it wants. Mindsets almost always consist of “shoulds, have to, need to, ought to, concepts, principles and knowledge. However, if you don’t want to apply those principles or that knowledge it won’t matter how brilliant or right on it is.

Science has now proven that it is our hearts that control what we do, say, and accomplish. Not our minds. This science is called Epigenetics.  I repeat….our minds can learn whatever is necessary to give the heart what it wants and the heart controls. The question is….what do you want with ALL your heart. On a scale of 1 to 100, it’s the 100s that motivate us to do, or be, whatever it takes to get that thing that is a 100 on the scale regardless of the barriers or challenges. I call those things that are 100s on that scale “Core Desires”.

We all know that 50 on that scale, aka halfhearted, doesn’t cut it. Neither will 80 or even 95 on that scale. Only those things that we totally desire…the 100s….things we are wholehearted about, will become reality.

There are always barriers between where you are and where you want to go. If the desire is 90 on the core desire scale a barrier that at 91 or higher will stop you. Just like a dam does water.

Right on the Money

A vice president of a large insurance company came to me and asked for my help. Although he was earning more than enough money to live very nicely, he wasn’t happy in his job. He had been at it for over two decades and had just grown tired of it. He wanted something else. When I asked him what else he’d love to do, he replied, without any emotion, “Well….I’ve been looking at doing real estate and maybe some investments because I know people who have succeeded in those areas.”

When he admitted that he had chosen those two professions because he had seen others do well in them, I told him,

“You need to consider another option. There’s no emotion at all in your voice. Your head is talking, not your heart and these options don’t reflect your Core Desire….things you would really love to do….with ALL your heart. What are you passionate about?”

His response was, “I’m lost.  I can’t come up with anything. It’s clear I just don’t know what I really want to do for money.

That’s why I came to you. I need help figuring it out.”

So I asked him, “What gets you all jazzed up and excited?”

Suddenly his face lit up as he said, “My heart starts to pound when I think about doing this one thing because it’s so exciting to me.” Before telling me what this one thing was, he added, “But I don’t see how I can continue to make a good living by doing it.”

I replied, “Scratch that last sentence. Just tell me what it is,”

“Well…. I really enjoy speaking. I’ve been to Toastmasters and taken the Dale Carnegie course….oh man…..I’d really love to be a public speaker and help people in their lives. That’s what I’d really love to do! But I don’t see how I could make it work and stay financially secure.”

His mind tried to sabotage his Core Desire to be a speaker with some “facts”, But we know that we had discovered what his heart wanted most. I asked, “Do you know anybody who’s making a good living as a speaker?”

“Uhhh…no, I don’t,” he said.  My response was, ” Well, That’s one of the things that I have done very successfully for many years. I will be glad to teach you how to function at my level as a highly successful, international speaker.

His response was, “Really? I did not know that you did that!” I then told him that there are 20 things you need to know and get good at, then you can function at my level as an international speaker and best-selling author.”  

He then said with great emotion, “Oh my gosh! Yes! THAT’S what I want! Will you teach me how to be a speaker like you?”  My answer was, “Yes”.  

He then asked excitedly, “When can we get started?”

Close But Not A 100

A young woman was struggling to find her Core Desire when it came to earning a living. At the time, she was working at a job she enjoyed and was good at but did not find satisfying to her soul.

I asked, “What would you really love to do with ALL your heart? Is there something that would bring you greater happiness?”

She said she didn’t know. But as we talked, she mentioned how much she enjoyed her volunteer work with abused children. “If I could do that for a living, it would be wonderful. Oh my gosh, I would really like to spend my life helping those poor children! And It would be awesome if I could have my own child center for them to come to.”

It was easy to tell from the excitement in her voice and the radiant expression on her face as she described all that entailed that this was definitely a Core Desire for her. I told her that that is what she should go after.    

Then the “buts” kicked in.

She rattled off these statements:

“I know I could do a great job helping abused children but I think that I’m too young.

I’d love to start this year but I don’t have the money.

I know I could but I don’t have a license and don’t know where to get one. Or even if I need one.

I’d love to make a living helping these poor children but I don’t just know where to start.

These were real barriers and they were keeping her stuck.  

I told her, “Those kinds of “buts” exist and are real. And you can trust that there are solutions to every one of those “buts”. She immediately wanted to know what they were. I told her to seek out people who are doing those things and ask them to share with her how they got there. She did that and she got what she wanted.

Passing Fancy

After one of my seminars, a young man came up and asked me if he could follow me around. He told me that he wanted to “become just like me.” He wanted me to be his mentor.

Although flattered, I suspected that this momentary glow would not last. I agreed to help him, but first I gave him some homework. His assignment was to go home and read my book and familiarize himself with my audio program. After he completed this assignment, he was to call me and arrange to spend the time needed.

I never heard from him again. This young man’s desire to be like me was a wish….a mere whim. A “goal” that he had written on a piece of paper. However…..once I told him all the work it would take, he got and stopped working toward it. Being like me was a wish not a Core Desire. It wasn’t a 100 on the scale.

EMOTIONAL VALIDATION

How will you know when you’ve hit pay dirt?

You will know when you arrive at the core because you will invariably have some kind of emotional reaction.

When you identify a Core Desire, you may feel great joy. You may even start to cry because the long-hidden need or want has gone unfulfilled for so many years. You may get sweaty hands, or your heart may pound with excitement. A smile or happiness or a definite statement like, “Oh my gosh! THAT’S it! That’s what I really want!”  Sometimes discovering a Core Desire is just feeling a calm, peaceful sigh of understanding or a simple, clear, doubt-free, quiet nodding of the head. “Yep. That’s it!”

Ask someone who knows you well to help you evaluate your emotional responses. Tell them to look for the 100s in your responses. Their observations of your reactions can be quite accurate. No matter how you react to discovering your Core Desires, you’ll know it when it happens. If there is any doubt it’s not a Core Desire. Or… you’re letting the “buts” prevail.  Fathoming a Core Desire takes introspection, work, empathy, and insight.

Identifying your genuine heartfelt Core Desires requires that you really get to know yourself at levels you might not have gone to before. What is way down there can be a real eye-opener. It may be humbling, embarrassing, or may open old wounds. In each case, it is valuable because it is the truth, and the truth will set you on the right path.

Don’t let your inability to see how you are going to achieve that desire keep you from acknowledging what it really is. Then….and only then….will you will be willing to spend whatever time, effort, and money it takes to make your desire a reality.

Here’s another idea. When you are having difficulty discovering the desires inside yourself, just guess. You’d be surprised at how accurate a guess can be. Guessing can also open the door to a part of your heart that has been closed for some time.

TRUE STORIES

One woman I know was stuck and just couldn’t move forward. I asked her to guess what she desired most. She immediately said, “Financial freedom.” I told her, “No that wasn’t a 100 on the scale”. She told me a bit angrily that I didn’t know her and couldn’t possibly know that was or wasn’t a core desire. She added, “who wouldn’t want financial freedom?”  Rather than argue I asked, If you have financial freedom what would THAT give you that you don’t have? She looked down at her feet for a moment and said, “Well, maybe it could be that…I could be closer to my son.” Tears started flowing down her cheeks as she started to cry. That was definitely one of her Core Desires.

We went from financially independent to time with her son in less than a minute because she looked deep into her heart.

I then taught her in less than 10 minutes how to create financial freedom through Network Marketing AND be with her son at the same time. She threw her arms around my neck and whispered, “you’re a miracle worker”.

A 45-year-old man told me, “I just don’t know what I want.” “Guess,” I said. He shrugged his shoulders and said, “It might be that I could be involved with people more.”

Then I asked, “If you were involved more with others, what would that give you?” The man got teary as he told me that his wife had passed away a few months ago, and he missed her terribly. He had found the only thing that helped ease the emptiness and loneliness was being with other people. So we focused on that and he discovered his Core Desires.

The bottom line is this…..if what you want is a Core Desire….a 100 on a scale of 1 to 100, you can find a class, a course, a CD, A DVD, a teacher, an expert, or a mentor to show you how to do it….or be it. Core Desires give you the ability to kick but! 

Many write down a list of goals, read self-help books, listen to motivational speakers, do daily affirmations, and state positive mantras believing/hoping that doing these things to make the things they want to become reality. That is simply not true. A large percentage of those “goals” do not ever happen even though a person does all those things. That’s because the “buts” show up and get in the way. When wrong thinking, ignorance, or wrong thinking kick in the “buts” show up big time.

It’s interesting that people can clearly see all the reasons they can’t achieve a goal instead of all the reasons they can. So they stay stuck.

That’s why it’s critical to learn how to identify your Core Desires in every area of life including the amazing and proven industry known as Network Marketing.

By Jack M. Zufelt “Mentor To Millions

Jack M. Zufelt is the author of the #1 best-selling book titled The DNA of Success which is now in 16 languages and has sold in over 50 countries.

He has achieved worldwide recognition for teaching people the true cause of all achievement. His life’s mission is to impart the truth about and dispel the myths surrounding success and achievement.

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Want to achieve better results? How about living a fuller life with more happiness, joy, and satisfaction? Discover Jack’s DNA of Success for yourself and live the life you’ve always wanted… Click Here –  http://www.DNAofSuccess.com

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